Is ‘hedger’ even a word?
I’ve been hedging a lot these days. It’s easier that way. Why take the chance to make a decision when you don’t have to? Plus, it’s so much easier to just avoid and hope the problem just. goes. away. It’s a great way to reward yourself. Check it out.
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- Decisions decisions
I spend my time minimizing the probability of the left but still think I can achieve the right. Not gonna happen.
Just this past week I -
* Walked all the way to the Twestival party and decided that I was “too tired” to attend. Translation: I don’t know anyone and the effort involved in introducing myself and having conversations is not *easy*.
* Avoided talking to some people at work because the conversations would have been difficult. As an avoidance expert, I want things easy. I want my life to always be relaxed. To be effort free.
* Avoided the broken elevator in my building because it might get stuck. (BTW, it was just fixed, yet I still avoid ‘just in case’)
* Walked off a crowded bus because it was chaotic and I felt ‘stuck’. To my credit, I got on the next one. I had a panic attack but didn’t mind. Yet I still got off. It’s just a pattern of avoidance that’s almost second nature at this point. Fuck, it sucks.
I’m sure there’s more. That’s just the highlights.
Avoidance Junkie
